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segment fourty-five

After yelling unapproite words at my dad once we were home, I was sent to my room. He didn't care what my condition was; I had to be punished. Once in my room, I covered my face into my pillow and cried. How could my dad seperate me from Taylor like that. I didn't want to leave until Taylor walked out as well.

"Peep, squeak, peep, squeak," came a familiar noise nearby. I looked up from my soaking wet pillow over at the the mouse's cage on my dresser. Taylor's mouse. Jennifer was sticking her nose out of the tiny air wholes and sniffing wildly.

There wasn't any food in her bowl and Taylor wasn't here to feed her. Well, I couldn't just let the poor thing starve. I lazily got up from the bed and went over to where Ike, Tay, and Zac's travel bags were. I knew I'd find mouse feed in Tay's back-pack.

Call me rude, but it was the only thing I could think to do. After drying my eyes, I unzipped his bag and looked inside. That was bad! There was a pair of plaid boxers right in front of me! I quickly pushed them aside and searched around some more until I found a small bag of seeds.

As I pulled out the food, a small book fell out along with it and dropped onto the floor. I looked down at it curiously. It was a blank book... Tay's journal. I dropped a few food pellets and seeds into Jennifer's bowl and tied the bag up again. After stuffing it back into the back-pack, I reached down to pick up the journal.

It was opened to an entry from only a couple of days before. I couldn't help but take a peek.

God, I feel like I could kill myself! Well, I wouldn't really, but... oh, things are so confussing and messed up! Jennifer and I aren't speaking. This is torture. I wish I'd never had said no... why can't I just apologize!? Nothing is working. Why do I have to be so unlucky. Here's something I can relate to:
The day that I left Jenny
A tear fell from her eye
Now I don't have nobody, and I was such a fool
On the day that I left Jenny.
The day that I left Jenny, she cried, then said goodbye
Now it's done, and it's over, and I am all alone
On the day that I left Jenny
Now I don't have anymore songs to sing
'Cause you're everything, everything to me
I didn't realize I felt this way, until that day
Today I'm missing Jenny, and you say that she's OK,
I hope she is.
Now I don't have nobody and no one will ever replace...
My Jenny
I love Jenny, Jenny...
On the day that I left Jenny... my Jenny

It was a slight remix of Lucy. My heart stopped and the tears poured out all over again! Taylor! There was more. My eyes blurred as I tried to read the rest of the entry.

See what I mean? I don't know what to do? I still like Jen. I like her a whole lot. I know it's way to early to use the word "love" but it keeps pushing into my mind. Okay. here it goes: I love Jennifer! There I said it. But this is driving me CRAZY! What should I do? I want to tell her how I feel, but she'll hate me even more. It's to late. I messed everything up. My life has been crushed and I still can't understand why I treated her the way I did. I liked being friends before, but now I think we never will be again. If only I can find a chance to tell her EVERYTHING before we leave and then she never sees me again...

The entry went on even longer, but I couldn't read it. I had already dropped the book onto the floor and had burried my face in my hands. Would I ever see Taylor again?

I cried a few minutes longer and packed up Taylor's journal and everything else I threw on the floor. My dad came down to my room and told me that I was allowed to come out now. I was about to join the family upstairs when my private phone line (don't ask, I've got one) rang and ran to answer it.

"Hello?" I asked in a sore and tired voice.

"Hey Jen. This is Nancy," I heard Nancy on the other end of the phone.

"Oh, hey Nancy. What's up?" I asked without changing my tone of voice.

"Uh, well, is Tay there?" she asked trying to make sure she didn't upset me. She's always known I've liked him.

"Um, no. He's not here right now," I said without adding anything else.

"Well... when will he be back?"

"I dunno, actually. Maybe tommmorow. Maybe next week. I just don't know." There was silence on the other end of the phone.

"What do you mean? He said he'd go to laser tag with me today!"

I was shocked. "He what?"

"He asked me if I wanted to hang out again and we decided on laser tag."

I thought Taylor had stopped with those things. What should I tell her? "I'll just tell him that you called, okay?"

Nancy wouldn't hang up that easy. "Jen, where is he? He couldn't have disappeared that fast!"

I sighed. She would have found out sooner or later. "Nancy," I started and began to wonder what her reaction would be. "Taylor's been in an accident..."

There was dead silence on the other end. Nothing. Finally, there was an outburst of shock. "WHAT!?"

"He.. I... we... the train... it kept coming... we were stuck... Taylor..." I couldn't hold it in. I began sobbing again as I told her the entire story from beginning to end. I could almost see the shock on Nancy's face as she listened closely to ever detail.

"Jennifer, will he be okay?" she asked finally in a voice softer than a whisper.

"I don't know!" I wailed into the phone. "I really don't know!"

I could barely make out the sound of crying from her end. "Call me as soon as you hear something," she said softly again.

"Please don't tell anyone except Silvia and Rosemary. I don't want this to turn into an international crisis."

"Okay, I promise not to tell a soul. Don't worry." After that, we hung up. I couldn't keep it in. Soon after, I found myself calling Jessica, Amy, and Emily and telling them all the same story. This day was the mother of all bad days. This was the day I found out my one and only love's life was in danger.

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